Their wildly ambitious stories about the mind transcending the limitations of the body, the need for individual self-determination, and a kind of vision of the future as a polyamorous leftist love fest make a lot of sense as coded stories about the trans experience. In the wake of both women coming out, it became at least somewhat popular for critics to read their films through the lens of their transness.
Lana Wachowski came out as trans in 2010 (though rumors regarding her gender identity had swirled around her going as far back as the release of The Matrix Reloaded in 2003 - and only click on that link if you want to be reminded how awful the 2000s media could be about trans people). The Matrix perfectly captures the experience of being a closeted trans person Neo and Agent Smith face off in the film’s climactic battle. It is by far the most influential work of pop culture ever created by a trans person, and it is maybe the eggiest movie ever made.īut everything about it that replicates what the trans experience is like prior to coming out - and, thus, made it so appealing to trans viewers - simultaneously tapped into some other zeitgeist entirely and became a weapon of some of the worst people on the internet. The Matrix was directed by Lana and Lilly Wachowski, two trans women who at the time of the film’s release had not yet come out as trans publicly (or perhaps even to themselves). The movie celebrates its 20th anniversary on March 31, 2019, a date that is also, coincidentally, the 10th trans day of visibility. Which is a long, roundabout way of me saying that when I was 18, I was obsessed with The Matrix. ” to realize, “I am.”) And what will crack the shell isn’t always predictable.īut if you look back on your life pre-hatching, you’ll find a host of clues that read not as questions but as evidence.
(It took me 15 years after thinking, “Wait, am I. It leaves behind something new and beautiful, but getting there can take days or years. And leaving the egg is a lot of work, a lot of painful, grinding work that many people would rather avoid.Įggs hatch, though, and the hatching process is messy and complicated. There is always some barrier between you and reality.
Everything is muffled, and the world is hazy and translucent through the walls. It’s kind of like being in a sensory deprivation tank. When you’re an egg, you’re safely closed off by your shell, unable to see the wider world.
Some online trans communities have a word for trans people who haven’t realized they’re trans just yet: egg.
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